Wednesday, November 04, 2009
Where Do You Stand?
The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy. --Martin Luther King, Jr.
What are your management comfort zones? When managing teams, my comfort zones are:
(1) knowing the job responsibilities of each position
(2) giving feedback and coaching
(3) conducting performance reviews
(4) holding creative staff meetings
Completing these activities comes easy to me, and I’m energized when conversations with team members flow and honest dialogue is established. And, there are times when these seemingly “easy” conversations turn nasty.
For example, you may be doing a performance review and the team member is not agreeing with anything in your assessment of their past performance. It feels like they are combative and defensive. This situation can be both challenging and controversial; challenging in that you need to use all your interpersonal communication skills to reduce any conflict, and controversial around the differences in opinions.
Your reaction to challenges outside your comfort zone is what your team is judging you on. They are assessing your leadership ability on resolving potential clashes. How do you behave when confronted? Use these 3 simple techniques to remain grounded:
First: Put your poker face on.
Keep your facial expression neutral. Breathe slowly. Don’t judge by jumping to conclusions.
Second: Ask smart questions.
Start filtering your response by finding out what you don’t know. Keep your tone of voice low and use slower pacing of words. Use open-ended questions to uncover facts about the situation. (Reminder: These questions typically begin with the words Who, What, Where, How)
Third: Get agreement from them that you understand their viewpoint.
Getting agreement does not mean you agree with their opinion. Your goal is simply to understand the other person’s perspective, and communicate that you’ve heard their side. You comprehend their situation, but you may not support it totally.
It’s easy to be seen as an effective leader when things are running smoothly. And, it’s during times of trouble that your true leadership characteristics are tested and decided.
Reflecting on MLK, Jr’s statement, where do you stand in times of challenge and controversy?
Until next time...live like you mean it!
Marjorie